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Sunday, February 3, 2008

:-?

In a weird frame of mind these days. Happy and kind of looking forward to things, with this feeling of expectation like there is something out there, tempting and waiting to be caught. Feel in control of things.
But then there is something nagging as well. As with the other feeling, cant exactly say what. Maybe that usual feeling that is always there with any joy?

Sun feels wonderful on the face. Directly though. When not on the face, gets irritating. Books don’t seem to be as punishing and torturous as about a couple of weeks back. Infact, quite comfortable and minus that usual stifling feeling that generally accompanies whenever they are on the table.

Singing out loud with any and every song that’s playing has become quite natural—something that happens on its own, whether lyrics are known or not. Other people’s frowns and complaints- all gone for a toss. All hail the new karaoke queen!

The idea and task of going out, making an effort and approaching people is a real pain. This weather does it to one. But then once around them, seems as natural as anything. Like this is how things should be. Not for too long though. after a while that feeling sets in-- of being on guard around someone particular. That wariness and wish to get away. This is noticed by the other person too. Hence stays cut off? Others don’t though. Act bubbly and its enough for them. Solitary strolls and outings are fun! Preferable even. Picking the phone and calling up is a task mostly. But getting calls is not. Once on, talking for hours is fun. Most times atleast. At others, so much easier to let the phone keep ringing.

This is probably what months of remaining anti social does— makes one so comfortable around their own self. So much so, nobody else is required. Mostly atleast. Wonder how long this can last though.

Ah, laziness.

5 comments:

arunabh said...

Something and don't ask me what makes me feel that this would have read even better as a poem.
All the while that i was reading this, i kept feeling that i am a reading a poem. And don't ask me why :D

Anon said...

lol. i am temted to ask you why but since you specifically asked me not to, il venture a guess of my own...
cz the sentences are abbreivated and missing 'i'?

Miss. Mystic said...

hey kritz!! its a state of mind..ur are an escapist ..not an escapist from reality bt more of a freedom lover...give urself a brk take a walk alone...and sit on a park bench and talk to nature and god..escape this reality to a gr8r one

Florence R. said...

It's a phase. It's human. =)

Ravi D said...

Aha! That phase can last as long as you want. It's soothing 9 times out of 10 if you count... but then 9 is greater than 1, so enjoy. No all can have the moments of solitary.

Love the way it's been put :)