Sunday, May 1, 2016


so, there it is, in big bold letters. End of an era. All those age old crushes, those subjects of my puppy love, my adulation, the reasons behind my heartache, and some of the most moving (hell, at that time!) posts.. they are all now officially either married or betrothed. And lo and behold, SO AM I!

I have just spent a good part of last one hour trying to stalk one of these people, and their would be. And no, WITHOUT the remotest of emotional turmoils.. no envy, no ego, no heartache, nothing. Well, okay, maybe, a little bit of that ego thing, which makes you wonder as to what the man might have seen in this lady! But that was a passing whim, and is not really the focul point of this post.

The point is, i realized today how fluid everything in life is. And how we are designed to evolve and adapt.We only have to allow ourselves the chance to do so.To know when we have reached our saturation levels, and to know that obstinately sticking to that one thing (or person) is not really the best thing for us. To know when to call it quits, whether it is with respect to a lost love, a career going nowhere, or a degree, or any other tragedy. There is always an option of a Plan B, we just have to be willing to accept failure, and look towards it. There's no second guessing of the power that this gives you! Because when you accept this small thing, it is YOU who is choosing to walk away from something which is clearly NOT good for you, instead of leaving yourself at its' mercy. And that's a huge achievement in itself!

I fell for around 4 people, before i finally met the GB. And all of those times, it was unrequited. Well, partly at least. One of them was came close to being a real relationship, but it was toxic as it could be. I was trying to be somebody else's saviour, and destroying my life in my attempts to do so. I as an individual, held no value for the other person, except maybe being their fallback option. And i was okay with all of it, till i finally reached my saturation level, and my eyes opened to the fact that he was completely hollow, and i actually did not trust him at all. Because he had nothing worth offering to me, and i wanted SO much more than most anyway! He could never be the prince of my fairy tale because he himself needed saving! He was drained and empty. And he was trying to drown out his misery by clinging on to me, and making me his crutch. And the moment that realization dawned, i never looked back, I never felt the need to.

Because i then came across this other person, who actually made me realize what being a 'man' truly meant. What it meant to trust, to depend, and to be basically offered everything unconditionally. For the first time in my life, i felt like i belonged! And all this only happened when i chose to take a call with respect to my life, and walk away just at the right time. Any sooner, i would have probably not learnt the life lessons that i did, and any later, i would have probably missed out on my GB!

And this.. THIS is what i want to explain to myself once again at this stage in my life, to realize that time has come once again to take some more tough decisions, and make them your life choices. 

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