I believe that no matter how empowered we might believe we are, a certain helplessness always exists about each one of us. And it is manifested more often in our love, or how we love, more than anything else.
It could be the helplessness of seeing the one you love move away from you.. or seeing him move closer and closer to your best friend, until that time that the friend is on the inside and you've been ousted from the life of the one who you thought was close to becoming your life. The helplessness of still feeling for him after years. Of knowing that he knows, as do the others. Of knowing you're a fool in your heart's wake.
Or, when you are that person who stole him away from your 'friend' and have hence lost the friend and many more who thought you wrong. . And now, slowly with time, have come to possess the same fears, insecurities and confusions that the person in question used to tell you he saw in 'the other', the ones that you both used to be amused at together, and the ones whose absence was a part of what attracted him to you. You, who denies to herself what he has come to mean, eventhough your self centred mind spins a web of denial around you.
Or, it could be the helplessness of being that friend who becomes the current sufferer's shoulder.. you, whose shoulder they turn to for comfort, whose shortest absence in the hour of need is felt minutely.. you, whose own personal equation with 'the former' has become a victim of choosing one over the other. You chose the one you did because they meant more to you than most others. You, who shared your world, your happiness, your people because you cared unconditionally. You were always so sure it was mutual (though at times certain instances did say otherwise). But now you helplessly stand and watch how you've turned into nothing more than that shoulder. For everything else, there's usually someone else, or something else.. something you're not even invited to be a part of.
Or, when you are that person who stole him away from your 'friend' and have hence lost the friend and many more who thought you wrong. . And now, slowly with time, have come to possess the same fears, insecurities and confusions that the person in question used to tell you he saw in 'the other', the ones that you both used to be amused at together, and the ones whose absence was a part of what attracted him to you. You, who denies to herself what he has come to mean, eventhough your self centred mind spins a web of denial around you.
Or, it could be the helplessness of being that friend who becomes the current sufferer's shoulder.. you, whose shoulder they turn to for comfort, whose shortest absence in the hour of need is felt minutely.. you, whose own personal equation with 'the former' has become a victim of choosing one over the other. You chose the one you did because they meant more to you than most others. You, who shared your world, your happiness, your people because you cared unconditionally. You were always so sure it was mutual (though at times certain instances did say otherwise). But now you helplessly stand and watch how you've turned into nothing more than that shoulder. For everything else, there's usually someone else, or something else.. something you're not even invited to be a part of.
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